On to the Next One

The last few weeks have been what I would like to call "in limbo." I am recovering very well from my surgery, and am back to most of my normal routines. Up until recently, I was waiting for my Oncatype score, which determines the likelihood of my cancer returning. 

Well, I received my score last week, and guess what? I am in the middle. Also known as a gray area. The thing is, my situation overall is pretty good at this point. I don't have any cancer cells in my lymph nodes, my tumor was small, etc. But now, the Oncatype test is telling me that I don't have a super high chance of this shit coming back, but I also don't have the lowest. What a mindfuck. 

I decided almost immediately that getting a second Oncologist opinion is the way to go. I spent an entire afternoon swiping through the bios of all the Breast Oncologists at Memorial Sloan Kettering. Side note, is this what the dating apps feel like? I poured over every bio, and finally found someone that not only had amazing credentials and education, but her headshot was on point. (Sorry, that does matter as petty as that sounds.) 

My Breast Surgeon also called me that day to tell me she wanted me to get a Consultation from a Radiation Oncologist too, as my margins were measuring a bit close to the skin. (They look for a 2cm margin, and mine was 1cm.) Steve and I met with the Radiation Oncologist today, and he basically left me informed, but also confused. Because I am in a gray area, it is really up to me if I want to get Radiation or not. Essentially, it is how precautionary I want to get with this. 

Does this guy know me at all? (See previous posts on WebMD anxiety)

That said, I have to meet these other 2 Oncologists first before I make any decisions. The middle is an interesting place to be. On the one hand, I could have it so much worse, and I am thankful that I don't. On the other hand, I would prefer to have more of a definitive recommendation. 

At the end of the day, if both Medical Oncologists make the same recommendation it will for sure come down to the swimsuit competition.